Vikings!

Last weekend, we gave ourselves a long weekend and flew to Malmö, Sweden, after work on Friday. We arrived just in time for bed and got some sleep before waking up early to explore some of the third-largest city in Sweden.


Unfortunately, Malmö is a sleepy town and they don't get up early on weekends.


So, we caught a bus and skipped town and headed out to meet some real-life Vikings at the Viking Reserve near Höllviken on the south-west coast of Sweden.


After entering the Museum through the gift-shop, we found ourselves at the entrance of the Viking Village.


Our tour guide, a Viking holy man (sadly not the horned helmet-wearing, sword or axe-wielding, "Hagar the Horrible", Viking-type I was hoping to see), explaining in a strong Swedish accent about rune stones. Needless to say, we didn't understand.


A reconstructed Viking ship, and some pretty swans. The Vikings were a very clever bunch of people who were quite adept at making things.


Tam outside a Viking's hut. Our holy man guide chats to a more gruff-looking, but non-helmeted, sword-less and axe-less Viking. If you look closely, you can see he is carrying a wooden stick-like thing.He explained to us that it was passed down from his father, who had in turn received it from his father, and that it was something very important that Vikings need to use everyday.


Before this gruff Viking, we had encountered another (not in the shot) who was carving one for himself as he had lost his heirloom somewhere and couldn't find it, so he was making another. He made us try and guess what it was, but then revealed it was a poo-stick to wipe your bum. The gruff Viking then offered to pass his around before he explained that it was not a poo-stick, but a spoon.

Some Viking-made wares for the gift shop.


A Viking-wench!... She-Viking... Viking woman... Ahh... I'm not sure of the exact terminology, but there's a female one making some leatherwares. That wooden post on the right of the photo is part of their punishment tools, for use in minor crimes like killing someone.


AArrrh. Sorry, that's "pirate". I'm not sure what sounds real Vikings make.


Viking shields from different tribes displayed inside the King's Hall.




Me sitting at the King's seat.


More shields...




One of the Viking God's. This is Odin, the chief god. Note that he only has one eye. (If you're interested, he's a main character in a fantastic Neil Gaiman book about Gods and mythology called American Gods).


This is Aegir, God of the sea, the wind and waves.


A Viking sounding an alarm... No explanation was given. Maybe someone had entered the Reserve without paying the admission. Maybe someone had shoplifted from the gift shop. Maybe it was lunchtime...


A catapult! Ready for action. In the distant background, you can just make out the amazing Øresund Bridge, which connects Sweden with Denmark.


The Tapestry of Foteviken, which tells the story of a traditional Viking blood revenge, which means that if Viking A kills Viking B. Then Viking B's brother must take revenge and kill Viking A plus all of Viking A's family. A very tricky situation considering that it can get quite messy with everyone trying to kill each other or trying to avoid being killed.


So, you can get some "outside" help too. Like going to a King or the Church.


And then you get on your horses or sail over in your Viking sailing ships and kick each other's arses. And whoever's left over lives happily ever after.


The Viking Village


A Viking Dog! (perhaps a relative of Koco!)


...And then back to the city of Malmö, who have waken up to the sound of a parade!


This is the Radhuset (City Hall) at the Stortorget


This is the Malmöhus (Malmo Castle). An unimpressive castle with a real moat. The moat was a bit off-putting, having a particular brown hue and (up near the bridge) algae communities. There were plenty of swans and ducks and baby ducks around though. And we also saw three billy goats gruff.


We don't seem to have many "cool" shots of is posing. Here is one of me with a windmill. Over the hedge and out of shot were people sunbathing in their underwear.


This is the Turning Torso, the tallest building in all of Sweden. Ain't it grand?! It just looks soo cool.


And, another shot of the Øresund Bridge, which we crossed by train on our way to Copenhagen.